Just cobble it together, plonk it on your head, and smile a lot.
Why not plonk yourself and your guests in front of the warm glow of the television set this holiday weekend?
Suddenly we heard a musical and distant wail, something flew past the window, and there was a wee "plonk."
1874, imitative. From 1903 as a noun. Related: Plonked; plonking.
[wine sense fr French vin blanc, ''white wine''; second sense perhaps fr the dull sound plonk]
(Possibly influenced by British slang "plonk" for cheap booze, or "plonker" for someone behaving stupidly; usually written "*plonk*") The sound a newbie makes as he falls to the bottom of a kill file. While this term originated in the Usenet newsgroup news:talk.bizarre, by 1994 it was widespread on Usenet and mailing lists as a form of public ridicule.
Another theory is that it is an acronym for "Person with Little Or No Knowledge".