These Words Call Total Bullsh!t

"My ex is crazy"

When someone says, “my ex is crazy,” don’t automatically go judging the ex. This could indicate that the person saying this phrase did something pretty bad to make that “crazy” ex very angry.

So, the next time you go on a date, and they tell you “my ex is crazy” (for example, letting the air out of their tires), it probably means they did something shady and might end up doing something like that to you. Tread lightly.

"I did nothing wrong"

Ever heard one of your coworkers utter this phrase? Well, we can bet it was a coworker who gets defensive about negative criticism.

Using this phrase usually means they did, in fact, do something wrong and are mad they got caught (or want to assign the blame to someone else!). If you’re looking for the culprit, it’s probably the person who is trying to look the most innocent.

“I / Me / My”

Have a friend or a significant other who is constantly saying “me, me, me”? This is a major warning sign.

A person who uses, I / me / my too often is self-absorbed, and sadly it’s bound to only get worse down the road. Exit 10: fear of commitment.

"Anything’s possible”

Sometimes, when a person says, “anything’s possible,” they mean it. They consider all the possibilities and believe that anything can happen, even if some outcomes seem ridiculous.

And then, there are others who use this expression and mean the exact opposite. It’s said in a sarcastic tone, so what they really mean is, “no way that will happen.” If someone says this to you, (especially while shrugging their shoulders), watch out. They might not think your new idea will be as successful as you think, and you don’t need that kind of underhanded support.

"Thanks for the help"

Did you recently help your friend with something and it didn’t turn out that well? If she confronted you by saying, “thanks for the help,” but didn’t seem all that happy to be saying it, she is probably not really thanking you. Beware, because she may be mad that things didn’t go according to plan and blaming you (since you helped her) for the negative outcome.

Aren’t you glad you took the time to do that? Speaking of taking your time . . .

"Take your time"

This seems like a nice comment, when in fact it’s complete BS.

If you text your coworker that you’re going to be five minutes late to the meeting, and she responds, “take your time,” it doesn’t actually mean “take your time.” In reality, this statement translates to, “hurry up,” because no one actually enjoys waiting for somebody else.

"Glad to meet you"

During an introduction, it’s common courtesy to extend your hand and say “glad to meet you,” but is it entirely true?

According to The Catcher in the Rye author, J.D. Salinger it isn’t. “I am always saying ‘glad to’ve met you’ to somebody I’m not at all glad I met. If you want to stay alive, you have to say that stuff, though.” Words of truth.

"Mistakes were made"

One for the politicians, “mistakes were made” just sounds like an insincere apology.

This declaration is nonsense because the person saying it isn’t necessarily owning up to his or her own actions. They are simply stating the obvious without accepting responsibility, so they still look like the good guy. Sneaky, sneaky.

“I don’t like to boast"

If you hear someone (a speaker, co-worker, your family member) begin a sentence with “I don’t like to boast,” you know what’s coming next. They want to share their big news or accomplishment so badly, but they want you to be interested first.

This is a way to humbly do some serious bragging. Cue the eye roll.

"You’re perfect"

Have you ever been in a relationship where your partner says, “you’re perfect”? This is total BS because nobody is perfect. And, if your SO (“significant other”) wants you to be perfect, they aren’t worth your time.

Embrace your flaws! (The person you’re with should embrace them, too.)

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Word of the Day

Can you guess the definition?

biblioklept

[ bib-lee-uh-klept ]

Can you guess the definition?

Word of the day
biblioklept

[ bib-lee-uh-klept ]